2009

I can't believe that it is New Year's Eve. It is the last day of the year 2009... And I guess I can't help reflecting on the past year. This year has been one of the most hardest, and most trying of years...

- We relocated to the Portland area from central Oregon. Scott began his brand new job as a special inspector, and found out that he probably doesn't want to do this job for the rest of his life.

- I went on some interviews... but didn't get a job offer.

- I willingly gave my car back to the retailer, relinquishing something that I was very proud of earning as an independent career woman. Common sense won the decision, and we decided that it wasn't worth the debt without the certainty of work in the future.

- We bought a small used Kia compact car for commuting. The engine blew up, and we spent the same price that we paid for the car to replace the engine. The car still runs us around town to this day.

- We began a tiring and expensive lawyer battle between Scott and his ex-wife concerning the custody arrangement of Connor during his future first year of kindergarten in central Oregon. Although we were working amicably with her in the beginning, Scott's ex-wife refused to work without lawyers. After spending thousands of dollars, a parenting mediation plan was informally put into place. (Later, her lawyer dropped her because she refused to pay his bill.)

- We bought a used Honda SUV for a good price. It appeared to have some problems with the transmission, and so we sold it a few months later.

- Scott's sister, Wendy, at 30 years old, finally moved out of their mother's house. Mentally retarded and autistic, she moved into an adult care facility for the first time in her life, and she adjusted remarkably well. She adjusted faster than her own mother!

- I began care taking for a good friend's grandmother, who had just had colonoscopy surgery. This nurtured a friendship that will now last a long time. She needed care for a few weeks, and I enjoyed every minute of her company. I still do, and we still often meet up for coffee or lunch.

- Scott's sister, Wendy, was diagnosed with breast cancer and had a full mastectomy. For health and safety reasons, Scott's mother also had a hysterectomy performed on her. She healed quickly and with minimal stress.

- My nephew came to live with us at the end of the school year, and he completed his last couple of months of first grade at a school only blocks from our house. I took over his care taking and jumped into a stay-at-home role and dropped him off and picked him up every day. After he went back to live with my sister, I couldn't help suffering a small loss.

- After only a couple of months of actually timing, we got pregnant! And what a surprise! My emotional meter went from shock, to fear, to planning mode, to excitement... while Scott was all smiles.

- Our bankruptcies were both finalized. Although embarrassing and not something that I will ever be proud of, it marked the beginning of something for the both of us: freedom from debilitating and cumbersome debt.

- I began to experience the emotional ups and downs of the first trimester of pregnancy. I felt more sorry for the men in my house, who had to endure the bipolarness of a woman experiencing the severe rollercoaster of emotions of having a giant hormone thing take over her body.

- We took Connor and my nephew camping at new local campgrounds and to the beach. We love this past time and we tried to vacation as much as we could. We enjoyed summer to its fullest.

- I began volunteering for Leadership Clark County, an organization that proved to introduce me to many great leaders in the community. I have met senators, State representatives, City councilmembers, mayors, small business owners, large corporation CEOs, volunteer Executive Directors, and many other inspiring (and some not-so-inspiring) people that help to make up our community. Did you know that the next mayor of Vancouver, Washington is a civil engineer?

- I went on more interviews... and still didn't receive a job.

- On August 5, 2009, we suffered from an emotionally painful and physically damaging miscarriage. My uterus ruptured and I lost over half of my body's blood supply, nearly ending my life. We ended up losing our little baby girl that was to be been born tomorrow, January 1, 2010. It would have been my first child and Scott's first daughter.

- I succumbed to a somber and dark depression. I couldn't share in any joy from anyone experiencing pregnancy or smile at anyone's happiness in motherhood. Many days, it was incredibly hard to get out of bed, and it was only my pride that got me up and kept me searching and applying for more job openings.

- I turned 30 this year, and with some money from our savings account, we decided to celebrate in one of our favorite spots: Vegas! We met up with friends and family, and it was very fun to enjoy my milestone birthday under the lights of the town-that-never-sleeps.

- After many examinations and some painful tests, we finally were able to learn of the reason for the miscarriage: a bicornuate uterus with a rudimentary side (that the fetus planted in) that didn't connect with the other useful side. After growing to just over 18 weeks, the fetus exceeded the capacity of that side of the uterus and she ruptured out the top.

- We met with many different nurses, radiologists, doctors, and surgeons, and finally, we were able to have the surgery to remove the left side of my uterus, reconstructing the right uterine horn for any future successful pregnancies.

- Scott threw out his back, putting him down and out for a couple of weeks, which took him to the doctor to get pain pills to make him more comfortable.

- The Christmas holiday was spent in both of our recoveries. Our house was basically considered a hospital ward! Luckily, we have a great family who helps out, and we are extremely thankful that they don't mind waiting on us for a little while.

...
I can honestly say with confidence, "Happy New Year!" I look forward to leaving this past year in the dusty archives, and I gladly look only ahead. I have confidence that this next year will bring happiness, joy, and even contentment. May it bring the same for you.

Please, raise your glass with me...